Resentment, Hurt, and Hate, Oh My!

Advice from a local church

"Have you heard anything?" My elderly friend looked at her hands avoiding my eyes.

"No." I hate to respond with such hurtful news. "Every one's so busy these days." 

She mutters, "I guess so." Sorrow seems to ooze from her pores as my heart aches for her.

Once again...an injustice is directed at someone else. But my own feelings are bruised too. 

I know you may be thinking, I sound like a big sissy.

I don't blame you. 

My root-for-the-underdog issues are easily triggered by my sweet friend's sad situation. It feels like our feelings are exposed like a pink flamingo at the North Pole. 

My default way of coping is to over-analyze the situation like a cow chewing its cud. Over and over. Until I can't hardly bear the heavy weight of disappointment bearing down on my friend. Why do folks treat each other this way?   

Then hate and resentment build against the uncaring inflicter's of pain and I want revenge. 

But revenge is where I draw the line. I know better.

Because how can I be who God wants me to be if I harbor resentment toward others?

So here's my new approach.

Every time the memory of this situation rises, I just start praying. For the underdog. For the ones who inflicted the hurt. For my feelings and attitude.

A quiet, peace drifts inside me like a gentle breeze at the beach. Refreshing, calm and sweet.

No hating. No blaming. No over analyzing.   

Just peace.

I have a choice to live burdened or seek peace. Re-think and suffer or focus and pray. Chew on it or grow from it.

Romans 12:12 tells us, "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."

Ten powerful words to heal hurt feelings and prevent resentment.

I have no control over another's actions, but I can choose my response. 

What about you? Has someone's pain left you burdened? What's helped you along the journey?

Thanks for sharing.  

Tammy Van Gils plants words and grows insightful stories blooming with hope. She is sowing life with her husband of 35 years, a Yorkie Poo named Moose, and a dozen chickens. She enjoys gardening, quilting, and writing. She is a member of the American Christian Fiction Writers. She's honored to be a guest blogger and also a contributor to The Wonders of Nature Devotion Book (Dec 2016) and So God Made a Dog (July 2017) Worthy Inspired.